Last week, I zipped over to my local Barnes & Noble to see author TJ Klune speak. Though Klune’s first book came out in 2011, I had only recently stumbled upon his work, via an off-the-wall queer romantasy that made me LOL every few seconds.
Being new to Klune’s work—work which is informed by his experiences as someone who is queer, asexual, and neurodivergent—I wasn’t sure what to expect from his appearance. I only knew I wanted to bask in the presence of the person who had brought me so much joy with his Tales from Verania series.
I found myself getting weepy within the first five minutes.
Klune had so much good stuff to say: about grief… about queer community… about his faith in humanity.
But there’s one thing in particular he said that I immediately wrote down:
“People love very quietly, but they hate loudly.”
This statement speaks directly to much of what we talk about here in this space. It is a reference to bigotry. It is a reference to the most recent waves of anti-trans and anti-LGBTQ+ legislation. It is a reference to the casual cruelty that exists in the world. And, for me, it gets to the root of the troublingly coordinated movements of hate we’ve been seeing these past few years.
After all, it’s hard to perceive all the good in the world when all of the bad is so absolutely deafening.
In her most recent EducateUS newsletter, activist Jaclyn Friedman writes that “demoralization is … a strategy the Right uses to paralyze us.” She goes on to write about school board candidates who hesitate to talk about sex ed while on the campaign trail because it might be seen as “too controversial.”
“But you know what happens when we don’t speak up about why we support sex ed?” she asks. “We leave it to the extremists who oppose it to define the issue for voters.”
This echoes so many conversations I’ve been having lately (and so much I’ve written about in the past) about how those in power use silence as a weapon. When we are afraid to love loudly—to speak out in support of education that supports and affirms all people—the only messages folks hear are misleading messages meant to stoke fear and hate.
Hopefully, some of the resources I share below will help you to love more loudly.
Because I know that your love—for humanity, and for your kiddos—is what brings you here.
Full Disclosure: Sex Ed in the News
NBC News reports that amid book bans, DEI cuts and 'Don't Say Gay' laws, 7 states will mandate LGBTQ-inclusive curricula.
Sex Ed Resources
I mentioned last month that I was working on these, but those Guerrilla Sex Ed legislation pages are now up to date!
I wrote recently about kids and cell phones and online safety, so I thought I’d share a recent read for caregivers cognizant of the fact that their kids are “coming of age in a digital world.” Devorah Heitner, Ph.D.’s Growing Up in Public is about how we can connect with our perpetually online kids, and how we can support them at a time when everyone is watching. I especially appreciated its messages around building trust and independence by resisting the urge to monitor their every online move.
Action Steps
Advocates for Youth has a new, rad-sounding project called Hope in a Box, created because of the power books and stories have to help us understand ourselves and the world around us. As a direct response to the wave of book challenges and school censorship, the organization has created a curated book list. Teachers can apply to receive Hope in a Box for their classroom, and others can donate to support this worthy initiative.
For other ideas on steps you can take to support sex ed, EducateUS put together these nifty slides.
Hot Takes
It looks like these aren’t embeddable, but I urge you to check out this Instagram post and this one for some perspective on what sex ed actually is… and isn’t.