Do the Sex Talks Make You Feel Cringe?
What would make you feel comfier talking about the sex stuff?
Last school year, in early June, my child’s school sent out the next week’s “calendar-at-a-glance,” which casually mentioned that there would be separate puberty talks for the boys and girls. There was zero other information. Another parent eventually called the school and learned that these lessons were being given to fourth graders (my kiddo was still in third grade), and that they would be only a half hour long. The end.
At the time, I felt frustrated as hell. I wrote about it here. I had grand plans to reach out to school administrators, and to put together a resource list for parents.
But swallowed up by the end of the school year, I did nothing.
Which means that when my 9-year-old’s turn came around, nothing had changed.
This year, in addition to the calendar-at-a-glance, fourth grade parents also received an email about the single session their child would receive. In the email was a link to the videos that would be used during these sessions: one for boys and one for girls. These videos would apparently comprise the entirety of the puberty lesson. 😭
After about 48 hours of internal screaming, I emailed the nurse who was tasked with teaching my child. I wrote that I knew she wasn’t behind curriculum development, and that I was glad our kids were finally getting some info on puberty, as they can enter this transition as early as 8 years old, and some of them were turning 10.
But I was curious as to whether the school would send resources home that students could share with caregivers in order to keep the conversation going, as I knew lots of parents felt ill equipped to have these talks, despite how crucial they are.
The nurse (whom I’m quite fond of) responded with understanding, and also made sure my feedback was shared with the nursing supervisor, the PE/Health teachers, and the District Director of Curriculum.
But as to my point about resources, she referenced the videos she had initially shared, with the assurance that sharing these videos gave parents the opportunity to opt their children out of these lessons.
Which was not my point. 😩
As a supplement to the barely-anything my child received at school (she reported back to me that some kids were crying because they’d never heard any of this information before and, as a result, were completely horrified), I pulled out some of my favorite books.
We talk about puberty and menstruation all the dang time in casual conversation—we’ve been doing so for years—but I find that books can help drive home certain lessons, and also provide the wording we need to explain concepts our kids are curious about.
So, what about you? Are you also having these conversations at home? If you can, I’d love it if you shared at least one teaching resource you use with your kiddos, and/or one resource you found helpful/informative when you were growing up.
It’s my hope that all of our collective recs will help those who are still feeling unsure about initiating these convos. And don’t forget…
You can always search the resources at Guerrilla Sex Ed!
Hot Take
(an oldie but a goodie)
Today’s Vibe
(actually, this is just how I imagine the kids looked in my child’s one and only puberty lesson)