Don't Forget These Important Back-to-School Tasks
I gotta go back, back, back to school again...
Here we are, at the end of August, frantically checking off items from our kids’ school supplies lists, making last-minute runs to the local Staples, and overnighting erasable pens.
Or maybe that’s just me.
Anyway. Last month, I wrote about how we can protect our children, particularly when they’re at school, where it seems that teachers and administrators often fumble their responses to allegations of assault. I emphasized the importance of educating our children so they’re less vulnerable to abuse, and I recommended a handful of books that could help, including Kimberly King’s I Said No! A Kid-to-Kid Guide to Keeping Private Parts Private.
About a week later, I attended an online lecture titled 7 Simple Steps to Preventing Child Sexual Abuse: Empowering Parents and Educators. The speaker was—drum roll—Kimberly King! (A delightful surprise. I had registered for the event because of the topic, without even looking to see who the speaker was.)
King’s lecture was fantastic, and you can still register to gain access to the recording. I loved it because it reminded me of the conversations I should be having with my child on a regular basis…and especially now, with a new school year looming before us.
Some of these are conversations I’ve written about before:
Talk about body parts early and often. It makes it easier for kids to disclose abuse and makes them less of a target.
Establish body boundaries. Let your kids know they’re the boss of their body, and that we keep our private parts private.
Discuss and model consent. That way, they’ll know how to practice it in their own lives.
Others were conversations it doesn’t often occur to me to have:
Set a no secrets policy, as abusers often try to coerce their targets into keeping their interactions secret.
Talk about emotions and feelings. Practice labeling them and describing how they feel in the body, so kids learn to trust those feelings.
Discuss online safety. My own child’s access to the internet is still incredibly limited, but this will become more relevant to us as time goes on.
King also spoke about the common signs of child sex abuse, including behavior changes, avoidance of certain people and places, hygiene changes, and sleep disturbances. Because there are still plenty of kids who hesitate to disclose abuse, whether because they don’t fully grasp what’s happening, or because they’re afraid.
Again, I highly recommend purchasing access to the full video.
But whether or not you watch the video, it’s worth remembering that these aren’t the types of conversations you can have just once. As our children grow older, they’re able to absorb and understand more of the information we share with them. So the key lies in reintroducing these concepts over and over again, over time, until the lessons you hope to impart are firmly ingrained in their psyches.
Full Disclosure: Sex Ed in the News
I know that many of you already know that this wave of book banning is the pits. Unfortunately, those who are against book bans don’t show up as often as those who are for them. I encourage you to check out this Mother Jones piece about an author—targeted by book banners—who is begging us for help.
As I’ve mentioned in the past, many states don’t require schools to teach sex ed. But a new bill aims to change that.
One of my fellow Sea Education Alliance members has been facing a huge backlash in her district. It’s absolutely shameful, and this longread in The Washington Post delves into why targeted misinformation campaigns such as these only hurt students.
A Favorite Sex Ed Resource
I continue to love the heck out of educator Kathleen Hema’s Instagram feed. But this particular reel reminds me of that time Em spotted the box for my unicorn-themed Le Wand and Had Questions:
Today’s Vibe
I don’t know what it is about this newsletter but, whenever I’m writing it, songs from Grease 2 pop into my head. Remember when I referenced “Reproduction”? This month, instead of my usual emotionally charged animated gif, I leave you with this whole-ass song, which is truly A Vibe: